Escape to Paradise: Howick's Magical Treehouse & Cottage Getaway
Escape to Paradise: Howick's Magical Treehouse & Cottage Getaway - A Review for the Rest of Us (and Honestly, Maybe Just Me)
Okay, so, "Escape to Paradise." The name alone had me picturing swaying palms, a bottomless piña colada, and maybe, just maybe, a Hemsworth brother casually lounging nearby. Reality, as it so often does, had its own agenda. This place, nestled in Howick, promised a "magical treehouse & cottage getaway." And, well, it mostly delivered. Buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your average, sterile travelogue. This is my raw, unfiltered, slightly-obsessive take.
Accessibility – The Good, The Potentially Awkward, and My Own Two Left Feet:
Let's be real, I'm not exactly built for extreme adventures. If "accessibility" is your top priority, this review needs a "but…" attached. While I think they mention some facilities for disabled guests, more details on exactly what's accessible would be… helpful. I'd advise calling ahead and grilling them about ramps, elevators (because, duh, "treehouse"), and bathroom setups. My clumsy self stumbled around okay, but I'm not a reliable test case.
Cleanliness & Safety (Post-Pandemic Panic Edition):
Okay, here's where things get interesting. The pandemic? Yeah, it's still a thing. And Escape to Paradise seemed to take it seriously - which is a huge relief considering my germaphobe tendencies. They had all the buzzwords: Anti-viral cleaning products, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer everywhere you looked (thank sweet baby Jesus), and the holy grail – Rooms sanitized between stays. I loved the Staff trained in safety protocol, and the fact that Room sanitization opt-out available made feel like I had some control. They even had Individually-wrapped food options, which is how it should be. I might have overused the hand sanitizer, but damn, it smelled good! They even had a Cashless payment service, a detail that soothed my anxiety. (I also heard they had Sterilizing equipment, but I didn't poke around to confirm.) I felt safe… mostly. Gotta admit, I still brought my own wipes.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – Food, Glorious Food (and the Occasional Hangry Meltdown):
The Restaurants… well, that's where things get a bit… complicated. There's an A la carte in restaurant, a Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service which had me salivating… but also gave me a little anxiety, which is natural when I'm about to interact with other humans. The Asian breakfast option had me intrigued, I'm a sucker for that stuff! Coffee/tea in restaurant is always a win, especially at breakfast. The Poolside bar… Now, that’s the good stuff. Happy hour? Oh, yes, please. I'm pretty sure there was a Bar which had a good range. However… I had a full-blown hangry meltdown one afternoon because I couldn't find a decent snack. Note to self: pack emergency chocolate. The Snack bar seemed a bit… underwhelming. They did have Desserts in restaurant though, which is a lifesaver. Overall, a mixed bag. I'm more of a "eat-everything" person so I was happy with the Buffet in restaurant.
Services and Conveniences – The Perks and the Quirks:
Okay, this is where Escape to Paradise really tried to impress. They offered the usual suspects: Daily housekeeping, Laundry service, Dry cleaning, and a Concierge. Plus, they did offer, Food delivery, which, if you're like me and prefer not to leave your room… is absolutely invaluable. The Elevator wasn’t a problem, and I loved the Front desk [24-hour] service. They had a Gift/souvenir shop, which helped me pick up several key souvenirs. There was an Invoice provided, which is always practical. However, the Facilities for disabled guests needed more clarifying, as I mentioned. I did see an Ironing service, I didn't use it, but I'm sure it was there.
For the Kids – Where Little Humans Bloom (Or Don't):
While I didn't bring any pint-sized humans, the promise of Babysitting service and Kids facilities made this place sound family-friendly. They said there was a Kids meal which made me slightly jealous.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax – Spa Day Dreams and Fitness Center Fiascos:
Now, this is where Escape to Paradise really shines. They had the whole shebang: A Spa and Spa/sauna. You knew I was all over the Massage option, right? Pure bliss. However, the best part? A Pool with view, the pictures speak for themselves. The Sauna was hot, but in a good way. The Steamroom felt amazing. They also had a Gym/fitness, which I looked at and promptly decided to avoid. Let's just say my idea of "fitness" involves vigorous remote control use. They had a Body scrub and Body wrap which definitely sounds like I would get completely lost in. They did have a Foot bath which is amazing after walking around for hours.
Getting Around – From Airport Transfers to the Car Park Chaos (Maybe):
They had a Car park [free of charge], which is a massive win. Also, the offer of Airport transfer is an amazing thing.
Available in All Rooms – The Nitty-Gritty (and My Personal Toiletries Obsession):
Right, let’s delve into the actual rooms. The stuff that truly matters. Air conditioning? Check. Alarm clock? Double-check. The Bathrobes were fluffy. The Bathtub was deep. The Coffee/tea maker was a lifesaver. They had Complimentary tea, which I drank approximately 50 cups of. The Desk was functional, even if I mostly used it to pile up snacks. The Free bottled water was a godsend. Hair dryer – present and accounted for. Ironing facilities? Yep. Mini bar with drinks? Always a plus. Non-smoking? Thank goodness. The Private bathroom was, well, private. The Safe box? I felt confident. The Shower? Good water pressure. The Slippers, were actually quite comfy. The Smoke detector made me feel safe. The Toiletries, were pretty basic, but I brought my own anyway (because, you know, I'm picky). The Wi-Fi [free] worked, but sometimes I just wanted to throw my laptop out the window. The Window that opens, was a great advantage. I was thankful for Extra long bed. A Reading light and a Socket near the bed is a basic necessity for us bookworms.
My One Truly Magical Moment (Stream of Consciousness Alert!):
Okay, so, I’m sitting on the terrace - Terrace – after a killer massage. The sun is setting, painting the sky in these ridiculous, impossible colours. The air is crisp, carrying the scent of… something floral and lovely. I'm in my robe, sipping a lukewarm coffee, and I'm actually… content. For once, I'm not worrying. I'm not planning. I'm just… being. And in this moment, surrounded by the sounds of nature (and the faint hum of the air conditioning, bless it), "Escape to Paradise" fully delivered on its promise. That moment, right there, was worth every single… well, let’s just say it was worth the slightly wonky snack bar experience. I had Soundproof rooms, which was great. This moment was pretty near perfection.
The Verdict – Would I Go Back? (Well, Maybe… If They Fix the Snack Bar):
"Escape to Paradise" isn't perfect. It has its quirks. But it's got heart. It's got a spa that’ll melt your troubles away. It's got those moments of pure, unadulterated bliss. Would I go back? Absolutely. But next time, I'm packing my own damn snacks. And maybe, just maybe, I'll try the gym… for a whole five minutes. You should seriously consider this place. I loved the Couple's room. The Alarm clock woke me up every morning. Metadata:
- Title: Escape to Paradise: Howick's Magical Treehouse & Cottage Getaway - A Brutally Honest Review
- Keywords: Escape to Paradise, Howick, treehouse, cottage, getaway, review, spa, massage, pool, restaurant, accessibility, cleanliness, safety, COVID-19, things to do, accommodation, travel, hotel, South Africa, vacation, relaxation, wifi, fitness center.
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary! We're off to Sycamore Avenue Treehouses & Cottages in Howick, South Africa. And let me tell you, getting there was already a comedy of errors, mostly involving my attempts to pack "lightly" (code for: squeezing a whole wardrobe into a carry-on).
Day 1: Arrival & "OMG, This Place!"
- Morning (or, as I like to call it, The Hunger Games of Baggage Claim):
- Arrive at Durban's King Shaka International Airport. Smooth? Ha! Turns out my "clever" idea of packing my hiking boots separately in a flimsy bag meant they were now cavorting in a lost luggage limbo with a bewildered-looking stuffed penguin. Chaos, I tell you!
- Hire car. Yes, I opted for the tiny one. "Easy to park," they said. "Fuel-efficient," they said. Lies! This thing felt like driving a go-kart, especially on South African roads.
- Pro Tip: Pack a sense of humour. You'll need it. And maybe a spare pair of shoes.
- Afternoon: Sycamore Avenue, Here We Come!
- Arrive at Sycamore Avenue. Whoa. Okay, so the photos don't lie. It's even more ridiculously charming in real life. Treehouses! ACTUAL treehouses! I half expected Tarzan to swing down and offer me a cocktail. (Note to self: pack Tarzan-appropriate cocktail attire.)
- Check in. Meet the owners, who are lovely, and immediately get the sense they've seen it all. I mean, they must have. They probably have a wall of bizarre guest stories. I’m already plotting my contribution.
- The Cottage Unveiling: I booked "The Canopy" (a total cliché, I know, but…trees!). Walk in, and BAM! Sunlight flooding through massive windows. Rustic chic galore! I swear, my jaw actually dropped. It's like living in an Instagram filter…except the air actually smells good. Smell of pine and a lingering hint of the fresh, green environment.
- Evening: Settling In & Fireflies (Maybe?)
- Unpack (ish). Found the boots! Triumph! Now that’s something to cheer over.
- Explore a bit. The grounds are a lush wonderland of ferns and… well, more trees. I'm pretty sure I saw a rogue fairy flitting around.
- Braai (BBQ) essentials purchased.
- Attempt at a romantic fire: (Cue dramatic music). Okay so, here's the thing. I'm hopeless at starting fires. My attempts usually involve mountains of kindling, a whole lot of swearing, and eventually, the neighbour's lighter. We got there.
- Fire crackling, wine flowing (a local Pinotage – divine!). Now it's about getting cozy.
- Stargazing. South African skies are just…different. Bigger. It's humbling, you know?
- Quirky Observation: The only sound in the night is the cricket symphony in the darkness. It's calming, but I can't help feel like I wandered into a David Lynch movie.
Day 2: Nature's Playground & (Potentially) Getting Lost
- Morning: Coffee, Clouds, and a Slight Panicked Moment
- Wake up in a treehouse. Surreal. It's like being a kid again. But with better coffee.
- Breakfast on the deck, surrounded by birdsong. Okay, this is the life. Pure bliss.
- Hike to Karkloof Falls. I mean, who can resist that?
- The Hike of Epic Failures: The route was "easy," they said. Lies again! After a brief moment of feeling smug about my fitness, I was panting like a marathon runner. The view, though? Absolutely breathtaking. Worth the aching thighs, and the almost slipping on a loose rock.
- The Almost-Lost Incident: Okay, so maybe I strayed from the path a tiny bit. Found myself convinced I was wandering into some secret fairy-tale land. Briefly considered building a fort. Common sense eventually won out (thankfully).
- Afternoon: Chocolate Heaven & Artistic Struggles
- Return, shower. Refuel after a hike.
- Visit the local chocolate shop (essential!). I almost fainted from sheer joy. Dark chocolate with chilli? Yes, please!
- Artistic Ambitions: I decided to try and capture the beauty of the scenery with a pencil and paper. The result looks suspiciously like a toddler scribbled it.
- Evening: Braai Round Two & Regrets (Maybe Not)
- Braai at our cottage. Got a bit more confident this time. I even managed to avoid setting fire to the sausages. Success!
- More wine. More stargazing
- Emotional Reaction: Feeling relaxed for the first time in ages. Like a giant weight has been lifted. Also, slightly terrified that I'll have to leave this paradise.
- Rambling Moment: I wonder if I can just stay here forever. Become a professional treehouse-dweller. Serve tourists their breakfast and show them around
- Messy confession: I'm probably going to regret that last bottle of wine in the morning. But, hey, YOLO!
Day 3: Farewell, for Now… & The "I Need This!" Factor
- Morning: Last Glimpses & Packed with Memories
- One last glorious breakfast on the deck. Trying to soak up every last ray of sunshine.
- Wandered the grounds, just to say goodbye.
- Packed. (This time I remembered to pack the toothbrush in a sensible place.)
- The "I Need This" Factor: As I was leaving, I couldn't help but feeling a deep contentment. This whole experience has been exactly what I needed to hit the refresh button on life.
- Opinionated language: If you need a break from the world, a dose of nature, and a healthy dose of "wow," Sycamore Avenue is the place to be. Go. Just go!
I'm already plotting my return…and I'm definitely bringing a better fire-starter next time!
100-Year-Old Secret: Discover the Enchanting Eichenwäldchen of Mittelherwigsdorf!
Okay, so… How do I even *find* this "Magical Treehouse"? And is it actually real, or did I stumble onto a well-crafted Instagram ad designed to break my already fragile heart?
Right, so, the location is somewhat… elusive. It's in Howick, obviously. Which is in, you know, *New Zealand*. That's the easy part. Finding the *exact* treehouse? Let’s just say, be prepared to ask around, maybe give the host a call (they're usually lovely!), and be ready for a little bit of, ahem, "character-building" adventure. I say this from experience! My GPS was convinced it knew better, and I ended up on a goat track. Goats, I tell you! They just stood there, judging my city slicker wheels. Eventually, though, I saw it… and promptly burst into tears. (Happy tears, I swear!) It's real. It's *magical*. Your heart won't be broken, just… maybe a little bit overwhelmed.
I've seen the pictures; *are* the views as ridiculously good as they seem? I mean, is this some kind of Photoshop wizardry?
Okay, deep breath. The views. The VIEWS. You know when they say pictures don't do something justice? This isn't just that. This is a whole new category of "under-representation." I was expecting something nice, maybe a glimpse of a distant hill. What I *got* was a panoramic explosion of gorgeousness. Lush green valleys, rolling hills, the ocean shimmering in the distance… it's breathtaking. And yes, I did spend a good five minutes trying to work out if it was a clever green screen. Spoiler alert: it's not. It's just… New Zealand showing off, I guess. And yeah, that tiny, slightly crooked balcony really IS as amazing as it looks. Prepare to spend hours there. (Seriously, hours. Bring snacks.)
Is the treehouse… stable? Like, will it collapse in a stiff breeze? I'm asking for a friend… and also, for me.
Look, I'm no structural engineer. What I *can* say is that the treehouse *felt* solid. Really solid. There were no alarming creaks or groans that made me, you know, clench. I’m not even sure what kind of wood it was, but it was definitely sturdy. The way it's built into the trees is actually pretty cool. It feels like a proper part of the landscape, not like it was just… stuck up there. I might have spent a bit *too* long rocking on the porch swing, testing its limit. Still standing, still swinging. Phew.
What about the toilet situation? Is it a composting toilet? Is it a hike? I'm picturing a pre-trip pep talk...
Okay, here’s where things get a little… rustic. The treehouse has its own bathroom, thank goodness! But it's not a five-star hotel bathroom, okay? It's… efficient. Clean. And… well, let's just say it's a good idea to embrace the "au naturale" vibe. I think… I THINK it's a normal toilet. But I didn’t stare. I was too busy staring out the window at the gorgeous trees to be critical. And honestly? It's part of the charm. You're escaping the city, right? Embrace the quirky. Embrace the… well, you get the idea. Just pack toilet paper. Trust me.
Are the bugs going to eat me alive? I'm more of a 'stay inside with a blanket' type of person.
Listen, it's a treehouse. Surrounded by nature. Bugs are inevitable. I'm not going to sugarcoat it, but you will encounter some. Mosquitoes, maybe a few spiders (they mostly kept to themselves, I promise!), the occasional moth… It's all part of the experience. Just bring repellent and embrace your inner nature warrior! I actually found myself quite enjoying the sounds of the crickets at night. It's kind of… soothing. Plus, there are windows, you can close them! And the cottage has proper walls, so you can retreat.
Okay, the cottage… is it actually comfortable, or is it some kind of glorified shed with a bed? I'm not a fan of roughing it *too* much.
The cottage? Lovely. Honestly, it's a really stylish, well-equipped space. The bed was comfortable (always a win!), the kitchen had everything you need (although, yes, I did struggle to open a jar of something. My fault completely.), and the decor was just… perfect. Think cozy, rustic, with a touch of modern. And a fireplace! Seriously, a fireplace! I spent one evening curled up on the sofa with a book and a glass of wine, and I felt like I was in a movie. I think I even started talking to the cat (who wasn't mine, but he clearly needed someone to talk to.).
What about food? Is there a shop nearby, or should I pack enough snacks to feed a small army to avoid complete starvation and hanger?
Okay, food is definitely something you need to plan for. There are shops in Howick, but you'll want to stock up on the essentials before you head out to the treehouse. I may or may not have arrived woefully under-prepared, and had to rely on a bag of chips for dinner one night, because I FORGOT THE GODDAMN POTATOES! Learn from my mistake, people! Pack snacks, breakfast stuff, and maybe even a fancy meal, if you're feeling ambitious. The kitchen has everything you need to cook. And trust me, eating dinner on that balcony, with that view... it's worth the effort. Though I'm going to say this again, pack snacks!
What should I actually pack? I'm notoriously the "over-packer," but I also don't want to arrive and realize I forgot, like, the sunscreen, or, you know… my brain.
Right, packing. Essential items: Sunscreen (that New Zealand sun is NO JOKE!), bug spray, comfortable shoes for exploring, layers (because the weather can change on a whim), and your camera. Don't forget a book! (I read the whole thing in a day!) A good book, a great view, a cup of tea… pure bliss. Also, don't forget those snacks!!! (I know I keep saying it, but it's important!) And, if you're anything like me, pack a sense ofHotel Search Tips
